I have to admit, I’ve spent so much time focusing on getting the Galaxy back into shape, in my quest for ultimate control of the Galaxy, I’ve been putting you guys ahead of my own needs. Sure, I’m supreme overlord of the Galaxy, and you all live and die at the slightest whim from me. […]Read more "Love is in the air?"
Well folks, some of my team are just so excited about the way we’re moving forward together. One galaxy, moving forward. Under my supreme rule. Just so exciting! Anyway they’re just so stoked about what we’re doing, they sometimes can’t help running off at the mouth a bit. Case in point, my councellor Asajj Ventress […]Read more "We don’t lie about massacres for our own ends!"
The Republic is gone, my mailbag is filled with so many letters soaked in liberal tears. They all seem to have a return address of Alderaan. Also gone are the Jedi, the so called defenders of the peace who led us into one of the most costly galactic wars of all time. Complete failures. But […]Read more "Moving the Empire forward into lightspeed"
I’m feeling like I need to have to run some IQ tests on the general population. I’ve said several times now. Jedi – they’re dangerous. Need I have to refresh your memory that they were behind a failed takeover and assassination attempt on both myself and my right hand man Darth Vader? Let me just remind […]Read more "Jedi. How many times do I have to remind you of the danger they represent?"
For over a millennia the Jedi Knights were in charge of maintaining peace and order in the galaxy. And what an absolute disaster that was. They failed with the Trade Federation occupation at Naboo, and it led in the end to the Clone Wars and slaughter on a galactic scale. Everything (and boy do I […]Read more "Fronting the cost of policing the galaxy"
I get no more satisfaction in issuing another Executive Order than you do. However as your unelected President and Emperor, it’s the responsibility of my administration to rescue us from the catastrophe of the recent Clone Wars. And folks, the economy has just been so hammered during those years. It’s an absolute disaster out there. Which brings […]Read more "Don’t stand in the way of progress on Kashyyyk"
Since I’ve taken office, the stories which have come out about me. Well, they’re total lies. Fake news. The latest one concerns the whole Separatist movement, how they really hacked the Republic to get me into position as Chancellor and now as your President. Bail Organa. Look at this loser, I trounced him in […]Read more "My presidency was not hacked by Separatists. More fake news!"